Parenting is probably one of the hardest jobs in the world, and no one can guarantee that in the process of raising children, they have never made a mistake. There are many familiar behaviors and sayings of parents, especially those of the previous generation, which are extremely toxic but common and familiar. Even in dreamy fairy tales is no exception. When we analyze it, we can see that many toxic parents have appeared in children’s stories that everyone has read as children.
Mocking my dreams (The Little Mermaid)
Ariel has a dream: she wants to go to land and walk on land. However, instead of supporting his daughter, her father scoffed at the idea and ignored it. After all, we all remember the tragic ending that the beautiful mermaid had to endure.
It is completely natural for young children to have dreams and is encouraged. However, many parents see these as meaningless or wishful thinking. Such apathy not only reduces a child’s trust in adults, but it can also lead to a child’s lack of confidence.
Instead of ignoring and treating her words as childish words, Ariel’s father should have sat down and talked to his daughter. He could warn her of possible dangers if she went to land and carefully consider her wishes.
Excessive Child Care (The Story of Thumbelina)
Thumbelina the toad’s mother took care of her beloved son so much that she even chose a wife for him when he was an adult. Because of this protection, Thumbelina became a helpless adult, unable to do anything on her own and unable to hold onto her bride.
In real life, children who grow up with such overprotective care will become unable to be independent. Mother Toad should have let her child fail and cope with life’s storms. If she wanted to get married, Thumbelina should go find a future wife herself. Parents should not be afraid to let their children make mistakes. Failure helps them learn and find ways to achieve their goals.
Despise Children (Cinderella Story)
The relationship between stepmother and Cinderella is a perfect illustration of how adults look down on children. No matter what her hardworking stepdaughter does, the stepmother always finds something to complain about. Her daughters, seeing how their mother treated her older sister, followed suit and contributed to their becoming overt narcissists.
Of course, it’s hard for children to do something that really impresses their parents because they don’t have enough knowledge and skills. If the stepmother was appreciative and could praise Cinderella without downplaying her personality and abilities, the fairy tale might have had a different ending. For example, the whole family will move to the castle together and live happily. In real life, of course, we don’t have to clap our hands every time our kids tie their own shoelaces, but it’s important to notice that and praise them.
Not Respecting Personal Opinions (Story of King Chic Choe)
Many fairy-tale kings tend to disrespect their daughters’ personal thoughts. Princesses are often forced into marriage to strengthen the kingdom’s power, for political purposes or even without good reason. Fortunately, in fairy tales, things are usually resolved peacefully by some miracle.
But we don’t live in fairy tales, and ignoring a child’s opinion often leads to negative consequences. Children may become estranged from their parents or never learn to set and protect their own boundaries and interests.
Remember that a king is first and foremost a father and a daughter is an adult with her own views that need to be heard. And this should apply not only to fairy-tale princesses.
Putting too much responsibility on children (The Little Red Riding Hood)
If we forget that this is a fairy tale and look at the story of Little Red Riding Hood through the eyes of an adult, some details will really surprise you. How could her parents tell their little girl to go into the woods alone, even though it’s clearly a place full of dangers lurking?
In real life, some parents may also place responsibilities that are not appropriate for their child’s age on their shoulders. This causes children to grow up too soon, when they are not ready. This approach not only leads to dangerous situations that children cannot handle, but also leads to psychological problems.
With young children, it is a good idea to ask them to do housework. But if you let your child go away on his own, it is definitely wrong. In fact, in the story, the mother can completely choose to go to see her with her daughter.
Ignore You (Karlsson Tales on the Roof)
Child neglect can sometimes become more dangerous and damaging to a child’s psyche than being overly controlling. In this fairy tale, the main character boy climbed onto the roof and scared his parents to death. When he told them about his new friend, his parents didn’t listen to him at all.
This example isn’t really that far off from real life. If you don’t pay attention to your children and are always busy with other things, tell them you don’t have time for them, then one day, you will really “lose” your child. .
Parents should pay attention and care for their children. Listen to your child more often, especially when they are trying to share something with you.